After the Rain Read online

  Lisa De Jong

  Contents

  Prologue

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Epilogue

  Acknowledgements

  About The Author

  Coming Soon

  Copyright © 2013 by Lisa De Jong

  Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written permission of the above author of this book.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, brands, media, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of various products referenced in this work of fiction, which have been used without permission. The publication/use of these trademarks is not authorized, associated with, or sponsored by the trademark owners.

  Edited by Madison Seidler

  Cover by Mae I Design

  Special Note:

  50% of the proceeds from this book will go to The American Cancer Society

  and 50% will go to RAINN.

  The Day Kate Left For College – September 2012

  I’VE BEEN MISSING KATE like mad since I left for school. Actually, who the fuck am I kidding? I always miss Kate. Since the day I first saw her on the tire swing, there hasn’t been a single day that I haven’t thought about her. There hasn’t been one day I didn’t hope I’d see her or hear her voice. Every minute I’m not with her, I think about her. People walk in and out of our lives all the time, but there are very few who we hold onto long after they’re gone. They’re the ones who impact our lives and help determine who we become. Kate’s that and more for me.

  The hardest fucking part is I don’t know if she’ll ever love me the way I do her. It’s not going to change the way I feel about her, though. She’s owned my heart for a long time, and even if our time never comes, her mark is forever.

  Turning around, I let the hot water hit my face one more time before shutting off the shower. I miss the friendship Kate and I had, but I can’t wait forever. I only have one life, and I need to start living it in a way that won’t leave me full of regret years from now. I can’t keep looking back at missed opportunities.

  There was a girl I met the other day while standing in line at the campus coffee shop. She noticed my White Sox t-shirt and started up a conversation about baseball. As she went on and on, I wondered how a guy could go wrong with a girl who knows the name of every single baseman? Worst-case scenario we talk about sports all night, I take her back home, and never call again. It would be a shitty thing to do, but I’m not one to play pretend.

  I’m resigned to the fact that Kate may never be mine, but that’s also admitting to myself that I’ll never be with the one girl who truly matters. Coffee shop girl might help me forget for a short time, but every minute I’m with her, I’ll be comparing her to Kate. The way she looks, the way she smells, the way she talks or bites her lip … no matter how she does it, Kate does it better.

  I dated a couple of girls last year, but no one held my interest beyond a few weeks. It’s hard to be happy with a girl when you’re constantly comparing her to someone else. It’s not fair to her, and it’s not healthy for me. Maybe it will be different someday… maybe.

  I pull on a pair of shorts and comb my fingers through my damp hair. I should probably get a haircut, but I haven’t had time, and I really don’t care.

  “Beau!” I hear Rachel yell from down the hall. “You might want to hurry.”

  “Why?” I shout back, opening the door a crack.

  As soon as she comes into view, I see the smile highlighting her face. She’s gorgeous, but she’s also my roommate, Cory’s, girl. And even if she wasn’t, she’s not Kate.

  “It’s Kate,” Rachel says, startling me.

  “What about her?” I ask, suddenly feeling frantic as I push the door open and walk toward her. Just hearing Kate’s name gets my adrenaline pumping.

  “She’s here … I mean, she was here.”

  “When?” I ask, standing less than a foot in front of her. I watch the smile fall from her face—she knows I’m more than serious.

  “Just a minute ago. I bet if you run, you can catch her.”

  Without replying, I run out the door of our apartment and down the hall. I don’t care that my skin is still wet—soaking through my shorts—or that I have water running off my hair. Kate wouldn’t come here if she didn’t have a good reason. Everything that girl does is with purpose, even if I can’t always figure it out.

  I haven’t seen her since the day she told me her secret. To hear what happened to her the one night I wasn’t there to protect her all but killed me. When you love someone, you want to be there. If I had been, it wouldn’t have happened.

  I take responsibility for that.

  As soon as I open the door to walk outside, I see her with her back to me. Her shoulders are slumped slightly forward, and she isn’t walking very fast. It’s hard to keep a clear mind as I watch her. If someone had told me when I woke up this morning that Kate Alexander was coming here, I wouldn’t have believed them.

  As she steps onto the sidewalk, I can’t wait any longer, so I start running toward her.

  “Kate! Wait!” I yell, stopping her in place.

  She doesn’t turn around, and it scares the living shit out of me. Why would she come here and leave before even speaking to me? When I finally catch up to her, I want to touch her to make sure this isn’t all a dream, but something inside of me holds me back.

  “Look at me,” I whisper, stepping so close I can feel the heat coming off her back.

  “I can’t. I need to go,” she says. Her voice is weak, and I can tell she’s close to tears. I hate when she gets like this. I’ve seen her this way far too often over the last couple years, and there’s nothing I won’t do to never have to see her like this again.

  I wrap my arm around her and press my hand to her stomach in an attempt to comfort her—and maybe keep her from running away.

  “Why did you come if you aren’t going to stay?” I ask, my lips just a few inches from her ear.

  “Beau, please,” she cries, leaning her head back against my shoulder.

  “Talk to me,” I demand, pulling her even closer.

  Silence radiates between us for too long before she starts to speak again. “I signed up for some classes.”

  “Why are you crying?” I ask, walking around her to get a look into her beautiful green eyes. Water is rolling down my forehead and into my eyes, but it doesn’t matter right now.

  She matters.

  Her mouth opens and closes a few times before I hear anything. “I came for you.”

  It’s something I’ve been waiting to hear for a very long time. Something I wanted to hear before I probably even knew I wanted to hear it.

  “Then why didn’t you stay?”

  Tears roll down her face, and I watch as she wipes them away with the back of her hand. I want to pull her into my arms, but first I need to know what’s going on in that head of hers. “When your girlfriend answered the door, I realized I was too late. I didn’t need to hear you say it.”

  Fuck. Rachel. She’s so off about that. But I guess I’d probably think the same thing if some guy answered Kate’s door.

  I place my finger under her chin to draw her attention to me. “Open your eyes
.”

  Her eyes remain closed, and I can’t freaking take it anymore. “Kate, I’m only going to ask you one more time. Open. Your. Eyes. Please.”

  She slowly opens them, causing the corner of my mouth to turn up. I missed out on so much time with her because of what Drew did. I’m not going to let him take one more moment.

  I realized, after seeing her with Asher, that I had approached everything the wrong way. I pushed her when what she really needed was for someone to hold her hand. Watching them together almost ruined me, but he saved her when I couldn’t. I can’t hate him—not after that.

  My lips are so close to hers, I could kiss her if I wanted. God, do I want it. “You got it all wrong, beautiful.”

  “What?” she asks, her brows furrowing.

  “Rachel is my roommate’s girlfriend,” I reply, unable to keep my smile from widening.

  She shakes her head, seeming to contemplate my words. ”I don’t get it. She was looking at me like—”

  “She was looking at you like that because she knows you’re my Kate. Everyone in that apartment, or who has ever been in that apartment, knows who you are.”

  “She’s not—”

  “No,” I say, shaking my head slowly and cupping her face in my hands. “I’ve been waiting for you.”

  I brush my lips against hers, feeling warmth in my chest. When I pull back, I run my thumb across her lower lip, feeling her breath against my skin.

  “I’m here,” she whispers, leaning into my touch.

  “That’s good because I can’t wait any longer,” I say, lifting her up into my arms. I press my lips against hers again, letting them linger a little longer this time.

  I’ve been waiting for this. I’ve been waiting to have her in my arms. I’ve been waiting to have her beautiful green eyes look at me like I look at her. I’ve been waiting for this girl to be mine.

  “How long are you here for?” I ask, feeling a bit hopeful that I might get to spend the day with her.

  Her smile is brighter than I’ve seen it in a long time as she works her bottom lip between her teeth. “How long do you want me to stay?”

  I grab her hands in mine, running my thumb over her knuckles. “Can you stay with me today? I can show you around, and maybe we can catch a movie for something.”

  “Did you not hear a word I said earlier? I go to school here now.”

  I think my heart just stopped beating for a few seconds. She’s not going to want to know the consequences if she’s playing me; my emotions really can’t take any more.

  “Are you serious?”

  “As of tomorrow, I’m a student at the University of Iowa.” She smiles nervously.

  “And what would you have done if I had moved on?” I tease, pressing a few strands of her hair between my fingers.

  Her smile falters for just a second before she recovers. “I guess I’d start college out single. I’d concentrate on my studies, and maybe someday I’d run into a nice guy who I could spend my time with.”

  I cover her hips with my hands and pull her to me again. Her eyes lock on my lips as I lean in. “You have all the nice guy you need right in front of you.” This time when I kiss her, I make sure she knows that she belongs to me and I belong to her. I want to spend the rest of my life proving that I’m the guy for her— I always have been. “There’s no one I’d rather be with. There never has been.”

  “Beau,” she whispers.

  I place my finger over her lips. “Let’s go inside. I can formally introduce you to Rachel, and maybe Cory will be back soon.”

  She smiles as she places her hand in mine. I woke up this morning determined to move on with my life, and now I have what I’ve wanted the whole time. There are still some things we need to work out, but I’m content to just be with her like this for now. It’s surreal, really.

  “Are you going to tell me about your roommates before we go in?” she asks as we climb the steps to my floor.

  “Cory’s a cool guy. I think his dad’s the mayor or something back in his hometown. You’d never know it, though; the guy parties every day like it’s his last.”

  “What about Rachel?” she asks.

  “Rachel isn’t technically my roommate.”

  “I know, but what’s she like?”

  “She’s outspoken. I guess you could say she’s the female version of Cory, but she doesn’t enjoy the party as much. She spends a lot of time taking care of him.”

  Out of the corner of my eye, I see the quizzical look on Kate’s face. “They’ve known each other since they were kids and dated all through high school. Kind of like us, less the dating part.”

  “Oh,” she says, her lips parted.

  “Look, I didn’t mean anything by that. It’s just that they’ve known each other for a long time. And don’t worry, I already know Rachel’s going to love you.”

  Kate takes a deep breath as I open the door to my apartment. It doesn’t surprise me that Rachel’s sitting on the couch with a celebrity magazine on her lap. “Hey,” she says, throwing the magazine down on the old coffee table. “You found her.”

  I wrap my arm around Kate’s shoulders. “I could find this girl anywhere.”

  “I’m sorry about earlier. I thought you were someone else,” Kate says, stepping out of my hold to walk to where Rachel stands. “I’m Kate.”

  Rachel extends her hand, a genuine smile appearing on her face. “I’m Rachel. And I’m sorry. If a strange girl answered the door when I went to see Cory, I’d probably react the same way.”

  “Some girls can get a little crazy.”

  “Yes, but it’s not nearly as crazy as the guys get. I remember one day in high school, my friend, Zander, gave me a ride home after class, and Cory happened to be sitting in my driveway. He completely freaked out and put a dent in Zander’s hood.”

  They both start laughing, and all I can do is stand back with my arms crossed over my chest and shake my head. Not like there’s much for me to say. If I didn’t have lots of self-control, I would have pummeled Asher’s ass when I saw him with Kate.

  “Kate, can we go talk for a little bit?” I ask, ending their bonding moment.

  “You guys don’t have to do that. I can go. I don’t know when Cory will be back anyway,” Rachel says, grabbing her purse off the chair.

  “You don’t have to leave.”

  “It’s not a big deal. I have a few things I need to do. Kate, it was nice meeting you. We should get together soon and talk,” she says, grinning over at me.

  “I’d like that.” Kate waves as Rachel makes her way out. We both wait for the door to close, and then I wrap my arms around her thin waist and pull her lips to mine. She’s my addiction, and I’ve been deprived of her for way too long. It’s like I’m fucking dreaming, and when she moans, I know I’ve gone to heaven. It’s the sexiest thing I’ve ever heard.

  I’m completely lost in the moment when she pulls back and says, “I thought we were going to talk.”

  “Are you planning on leaving any time soon?”

  “No,” she says, looking at my lips.

  “Then we can talk later.” I dip my head to her neck and run my tongue along her sensitive skin. I can hear her breathing harder as I make small, deliberate circles. “That is, unless you want me to stop,” I say, pulling back to get a better look at her facial expression.

  “Later is fine.”

  “Good. Where was I?” She tilts her head and points to the spot below her ear.

  One Week Later – September 2012

  I’VE BEEN IN COLLEGE for exactly one week now, and it’s been better than I expected. I’m adjusting to being around people my own age again, and I’ve made more friends this week than I have the last few years. Rachel has been great, hanging out with me a couple times when the guys are still in class. I struggled a bit at first; I honestly couldn’t remember what I used to talk about when I had girlfriends—it had been too long. Beau and Cory ended up being our favorite subjects.

  I met my room
mate that first night when I got back from Beau’s. Her name is Emery, and she comes from a small town like Carrington. We get along just fine, but she isn’t the easiest person to get to know. So far I know she’s a perfectionist who loves to study.

  “Do you want to walk to class with me?” Emery asks as she walks back into our room from the bathroom.

  “Yeah, give me just a second,” I say, throwing my books into my bag.

  Surveying our eclectic room, I search for my flip-flops. As soon as we moved all our stuff in, I noticed our decorating styles couldn’t be more different. My side of the room is decorated in shades of blue and green, meant to calm me when I’m stressing out or when things get too out of control. Emery’s is plastered in pink and black, very bold for a girl who seems to prefer to fly under the radar. The two walls I was able to decorate are covered in Lifehouse posters, while hers have a couple bulletin boards covered in family photos as well as two black and white portraits of New York City. When I’d asked her about it, she said it was part of her dream to live there. Somewhere she could blend in without everyone knowing her business and live life under the rules she’s created for herself. While I have very few pieces of furniture on my side, hers is cluttered with a desk, bookshelf, and large dresser. I kind of get it, though, because she spends all her free time with her nose buried in a book.

  The way we dress, though, is so similar that the second day we had to institute a rule not to leave any clothes on the floor or doorknobs; it was too hard to figure out what belonged to whom. We’re both addicted to jeans, cutoff jean shorts, and long maxi skirts, and sadly, I think we hit all the same stores.

  “We’re having a Biology study group tonight. Do you want to come?” she asks, sitting on the edge of her bed. Not only do we get along, but we’re also in a lot of the same classes because as it turned out, we’re both majoring in psychology.

  “Maybe. I have to check with Beau first to see if he has any plans.” I

  slip the bag over my shoulders and step into my flip-flops.